I mean, don't get me wrong, I can be guilty of spending endless unnecessary hours on facebook, either profile surfing or playing scrabble, but there's something unnerving about disclosing your personal feelings online via your blog that seems too taboo nowadays. Maybe it's cos we take it for granted that we have the privacy of the inactive pseudo living-dead online world, or maybe it's cos we're too skeptical to even fathom the idea that someone we know might even bother to come and read what we've vomited out for the day. But all I know is that when I let go online, I genuinely feel unburdened. So i'm gonna do this again. I actually started writing one last week, but then i deleted it because I guess somethings are really just better off said in our head.
So hello virtual world. Will you be nicer to me than the real world was? Do you promise not to tease me, and make me hope before just ripping it all away just cause you feel like it? I trust that you'll play nice. Humans are the ones that we should beware of, surprisingly.
And no, I'm not jaded, yet. I'm still the same ridiculously optimistic girl I've always been but this time, next time, I'm not gonna let my guard down so easily. Because if even someone you really thought you knew well enough can hurt you, not be very nice about it, and then walk away as if it didn't mean anything to them, that's GOTTA teach me that life's a bitch so I really gotta start being more of one myself. It's just self-preservation.
So i'm gonna LEARN that bitter lesson for once in my life, and never let it happen again.
It's a Sunday. 2 weeks ago, i was in KL, happy and pretty much satisfied. One week ago, I was crying my eyes out at how things could change so fast. Today, i sit here numb, and unaffected, believing fervently that the people that are worth your time, shouldn't make you feel like shit. Which is an easy enough rule to follow, no?
So lets see if I can do better this time.
